Sunday, April 24, 2011

286- This

288- Nick And Norah's Infinite Playlist

Welcome back to- really really really quick recap-

I didn't know nor want to know any of the music of the Infinite Playlist.

Michael Cera is a very good straight man. However, I am getting slightly sick of seeing the same character in every movie. Recycling is good. Just not in movies.

If you lose a drunk Catholic schoolgirl in NYC, it turns into an episode of Law and Order, not a romantic comedy.

Three gay guys in a creeper van is actually pretty funny for some unknown reason.

Cera and Jennings are actually pretty cute together. Even the awkward Orgasm scene was endearing.

Evil Ex was suitably evil and never tried to redeem herself. I'm okay with that.


So, I didn't laugh out loud or love it and since I've had the disc from Netflix for almost a year now, it would punish me accordingly by not having the last two minutes of the movie- but like they say- "I'm okay with that."


Recommended: You have two hours to spare and want a sweet movie that doesn't try to be anything it's not. Oh, and if you like drag queens dressed as Jesus.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

289- The Manager

Patience is a virtue.

Or so I'm told. Obviously, I'm lacking a couple of those as is. But patience...

Patience I never quite got a handle on.

 ---

   "Excuse me, do you have a manager?"


     Great.  A guest. Staring at me, disdain clear in those watery blue eyes. I have literally two more people to check for credit report, it's not even 8 a.m. and he wants the manager. Great.

    "Yes sir, I'd be happy to go get her for you, but is there anything I can help with?"
  
      Come on, just tell me. Please please please don't say-
 
     "No, I'd like to speak to a manager."

   Great. Don't waste any time thinking about it, just go ahead and put me in my rightful place. Clerk. Scum. The humanoid presence that happens to speak in sentences. I should put a sign on the desk: Ring Once for Assistance; Ring Twice to Bitch for Free Stuff.

       He'd ring twice.
 
       "Of course, sir. I'd be happy to go get my manager."

       And pretend to walk away, fake start, whirl back and earnestly ask:

       "Oh, I'm sorry, what was the room number again?"

        "412-"

             Sucker. They always fall for the again line.

           "No wait, 721."

      Of course, because 721 and 412 are so easy to confuse. Let's see, Mr. Lovett. Ah, of course. The ones with Love and Joy in their names are the worse ones. Like they decided to overcompensate for a last name that automatically puts them in the happy fluffy category.

            The Killeroys and Homicidialles are usually pretty nice.

       "Of course, Mr. Lovett. I'll be happy to get my manager for you today. If she's not available, would you like me to have her call the room?"

           "No, I'm leaving for the rest of the day. You know, I just find it hard to believe that you would stick your customers in a room that is right next to the elevator, has the bathroom the size of a closet, and a room you can barely move around in--"

    Wait for it...
   
       "I was just expecting a lot more from the Brinkley House."

         Ding Ding Ding. We have a winner. 


      "Mr Lovett, I do apologize but due to the nature of historic hotels, our room sizes are smaller. I do know that certain bathrooms have little space but I'd be happy to move you to a quiet room that has a bit of a larger bathroom."
   
            "Well, that's fine but I can't do it right now since I'm on my way out, I'll stop by later and pick up the new keys."
         
         "Of course, sir. I'll take care of it for you."
      
    He's doing the peer thing. Trying to see what my name tag says. I wonder if he realizes he looks like a turtle when he does that...
  
         "Just stop by back at the desk later today sir and ask for me, I'm Samantha."

        "Fine."

   
        "Have a good day, Mr. Lovett."

          Hmm, and there he goes. No thank you. But that would mean he had to admit I was doing him a service as opposed to what he rightly deserves.

        "Hey I'm back, you finish the credit check yet?"

         "No, got a guest. You find the gift card in the back?"

           "Yea, it was on Tatiana's desk."
         
           "Do you think people know that they look like turtles?"

           "Something's wrong with you, Sam."

            "Yea, I can't finish credit check."
         
          "Oh, good morning sir, how can I help you today?"
 
           One more to go....

           "Is a manager available?"
 
           Don't look up, don't get involved....

            "Is there anything I can help you with, sir?"
         
          Bless her. She's trying. One. Two. Three-
            
           "I would prefer to speak to your manager ."

                 He's all yours, Jenny.