346- Duck March

Names have been changed because well, I can.      

       Welcome to the South's Grand Hotel, The *******. My name is Britney and I'm the Duckmaster (um not really) at the******* Hotel. And whether you are a guest or a visitor, you are truly a guest here at the ******* (how many times am I going to say *******?) Welcome to you all.  And a very special welcome to St. Jude! (Okay, a few people just wooted. That's a positive sign)

      And it kind of continued like that. I talked, fumbled around, and kept remembering to turn so the people behind me could take pictures of my face instead of my riotous curly hair-- which did not know it was going to be filmed today.
 
      I tried to stick to the script which I had fully planned on hopefully memorizing but with only 15 minutes, I felt best that I should just wing it. (Oh yes, I went there) So, when out came the jacket and the cane, I was so excited I was sure I was going to embarrass myself. Because Excited Britney is not a thinking Britney- no witty remarks or thought processes just fowl (Again!) jokes and a unnerving fear that I was going to blurt out a duck joke..(Why do ducks roofs leak? Because they have quacks!)

       Yea, I think I kept asking people if they were excited to see the ducks and kept leaning on my cane like it was a life support hose but people, I was the freaking Duckmaster for the day. No one knew differently (except very supportive coworkers) and I just barreled my way through it. (Even if dude in the back corner is playing a drinking game out of how many times I say *******)

      Then, I went to the elevator to get the ducks. But no one was in the elevator... So, I stood there and just smiled as people continued to take pictures...until my savior with an elevator key came in, closed the door, and took us upstairs. I then got to try and walk across the roof without biting it (red and black and snow don't mix well, people would probably know what happened...) to meet the other really awesome savior person who had unlocked the duck house for me and set the little darlings free. (get off the roof, get off the roof, get off the roof)

        So back downstairs, where they literally flew out the door, into the fountains waiting arms while I waited till the music ended before saying "Thank You!" and then stood there awkwardly (Um, what now??) before making a break for the desk. (I know them there)

       And it was completely wonderful to be granted the special privilege of being a Duckmaster- and yes it is a very big privilege- I mean, I wasn't an honorary Duckmaster- I was The Duckmaster for the morning of January 21, 2011. Awesome doesn't even begin to describe it. Everyone was fully supportive of my fifteen minute prep act and I went right back behind the desk to continue checking people in.

But no people really-- this is where lack of public embarrassment will get you.

             Cool, ain't it?

(Can I still wear the snazzy red coat?)