Setting: A Bathroom.
At lights up, Tony is reclining in the bathtub, a book of Keats propped up on the ledge, a beer on the floor, and his phone propped up in a stereo- playing something loud.
Enter Annie.
Annie: Heya Tony.
Tony: Jesus- Annie, how did you-
Annie: You know, as a police officer- you really should lock your front door. Just because you have a fire arm doesn't mean you should flirt with possible home invasion- No, don't get up on my account. I just wanted to have a quick word.
Tony: Annie...
Annie: Oh, no, no, absolutely not. Do not Annie me, buster. Do you mind if I turn this down?
Tony: Go ahead.
Annie: Don't start being passive aggressive already, give it at least three or four minutes. I haven't even broached why I'm here yet.
Tony: I'm guessing it has something to do with the fact that you just lost your job.
Annie: How'd you- Never mind.
Tony: Christ, Annie- would you stop pacing, you're making me nervous.
Annie: I'm making you- ha!
Tony: Sit down.
Annie: Keats. That's new.
Tony: Someone told me I should try it.
Annie: Someone. Sure. You mean Eliza. Go ahead, you can say it. Eliza. You know the girl you're about to move to West Chester with?
Tony: So you got the lease letter.
Annie: Funny thing about co-signing for an apartment- apparently when someone breaks the lease- you get a nasty letter from the landlord demanding compensation and a rug cleaning bill. And by the way, you got screwed on that.
Tony: I'm moving at the end of the week.
Annie: I noticed. I'm surprised you didn't hear me walk right into your boxes of pots and pans- I don't really think the hallway is a great spot for those.
Tony: I"m taking them over to the new place in the morning.
Annie: God. I can't believe this.
Annie: I mean, I can. It's not like I didn't know you were serious with this woman but God- moving to West Chester? You hate the suburbs.
Tony: So, why did you quit Biotech?
Annie: Yea. Well, when the guy you're sleeping with gets promoted to your boss, there's not a lot of options.
Tony: You could have stayed.
Annie: And been the office whore? No thanks. I gave him my two weeks and he gave me my key back. Lost my job and my boyfriend in the span of two weeks. If there's one thing I can do right- its to make the absolute worst decision possible.
Tony: You're being melodramatic.
Annie: I'm good at that.
Tony: You are.
Annie: So,... Keats.
Tony: It's pretty good. Not Bradbury- but decent.
Annie: Don't do that.
Tony: What? Like you stomping in here is healthy? This is a good idea? You basically breaking into my home-
Annie: I knocked first!
Tony: For what?
Annie: For you! I came here to see you. Because- because- oh god, i don't know because I thought maybe you could tell me-
Tony: Tell you what?
Annie: Tell me what's wrong with me! I mean there's got to be something fundamentally wrong with a girl who breaks up with a guy and then continues living with him for four months- sleeping in the same bed, cooking dinner together, going out to the movies- I mean, who does that?
Annie: And then I come home one day and there's another woman. Just like that.
Tony: We were broken up-
Annie: I know. I know. And I could have dealt with being a woman scorned but a woman forgotten? Pitied....I couldn't. I just couldn't deal with that.
Tony: I didn't forget you-
Annie: No, but you moved on. You moved on while I cooked breakfast and thought about how to tell you that I was wrong. You started seeing someone else while I tried to figure out how to lose ten pounds so you would notice me again.
Tony: I needed time to figure things out and I just couldn't do that while we were living together.
Tony: And it's not like I kicked you out-
Annie: You offered me the apartment. But I couldn't wake up in the same bed I slept with you in or walk by those stupid autographed jerseys-
Tony: Not the jerseys-the star trek legos I can understand- but not the jerseys.
Annie: You are such a dork.
Tony: Hand me the towel.
Annie: No, I think I'll just hold on to it.
Tony: Are you holding me hostage in my bath tub?
Annie: You're welcome to get out anytime.
Tony: I'm not doing that, Annie. It's not fair to you or me.
Annie: Or Eliza.
Tony: Or Eliza.
Annie: You remember our baths?
Tony: Don't do this, Ann.
Annie; Bubble baths, candles, jazz music... there wasn't any Keats though. That would have been a bit heavy handed.
Tony: God damn it-don't.
Annie: Sorry. I've had a shitty past couple of months. And then I find out you're moving and...
Tony: It's almost been a year, Annie. I haven't even talked to you since Novemeber.
Annie: You told me you needed space.
Tony: I did. I do. I thought I could but-
Annie: I know.
Tony: So, what's the plan?
Annie: Looking for a job. Apparently I'm over qualifed to be a admin and not qualified to be a laboratory analyst. So, I'm thinking about going back to school. Ha, god thirty three and going back to school. Slightly terrifying.
Tony: You'll be fine. You always had the tenacity to get through things.
Annie: You mean stubbornness.
Tony: I meant what I said.
Annie: That's fair. Do you have any more beer?
Tony: In the fridge-
Annie exits- and Tony snatches the forgotten towel.
Annie: Corona- what happened to the Coors? Oh.
...
Annie: I'm sorry, I shouldn't have come over.
Tony: It's fine.
Annie: No, it's pathetic but thanks for trying to make me feel better.
Tony: I'm sorry things didn't work out.
Annie: Between us? Or with the rest of my life?
Tony: Both.
Annie: Yea, well. Life sucks and then you die.
Tony: Hey.Come on, stop being-
Annie: Melodramatic.
Tony: Annoying.
Annie: Whatever. So, you moving to a two bedroom?
Tony: Zero lot out in east.
Annie: Wow. Eliza makes some decent money at the editor's office.
Tony: She just got promoted to the manger of their West Chester branch- hence...
Annie: Lucky bitch.Sorry. I meant- well, you know what I meant. God, I really suck at this.
Tony: How's your sister?
Annie: Lucy's good. She and Tom just got engaged actually. Thinking about moving out west. I don't know, I think she'll probably end up moving wherever his job takes him.
Tony: Tom still working in fiances?
Annie: Yea. He just got hired at a firm that has headquarters up in New York and he might try to get a transfer up there to be closer to his sisters. But you know how Lucy feels about his mom, so.
Tony: You ever think about moving?
Annie: Lately? Yea.
Tony: You have a lot going for you, Annie. It's just not-
Annie: The right time? Yea, got that. I got that and the rejection letters to prove it. How you been?
Tony: Well, considering I'm standing in my bathroom with my ex, drinking beers and half naked- I'm not really sure.
Annie: I'm not your ex. I'm Annie, I'm Annie for God's sake. Don't act like-
Tony: Ann! I'm sorry but you are. You are my ex-girlfriend. Not my friend- not my lover- my ex.
Annie: I'm Annie! Annie- Annie who held your hand at your grandfather's funeral- Annie who helped you push your old Subaru around every time it broke down on the side of the road- Annie who sat beside you and listened to you moan every time the Rangers lost- the one you took to the emergency room when I got hit by the bike messenger- the one who gave us both food poisoning on Valentine's Day- the one you took to the mountains and danced with under the waterfall- I'm Annie. I'm not your ex. I'm just Annie.
Annie: I hope you know how much I loved you.
Tony: I can't do this. Not with you. Not right now.
Annie: I"m not asking for anything- or looking for anything. I just...
Annie: I just needed to say goodbye.
Tony: We said goodbye.
Annie: You said goodbye.
Tony: I don't know what I'm supposed to-
Annie; You're supposed to move to West Chester and be happy. You're supposed to fall madly in love and get married and have babies and raise them to be Rangers fans since no one would choose to be- and you're supposed to be Tony.
Tony; And what about you, Annie?
Annie: I'm supposed to move on. I'm supposed to figure something out and get through this slump that has been my life the past two years and just get a grip on something. Anything. That's what I'm supposed to do.
Annie: By the way, you better not skip out on the contract clause. I'm not paying for the carpet cleaning.
Tony: Did you pour a bottle of beer on the rug again?
Annie: One time and you never let me forget it.
Tony: Annie.
Annie: It's weird to think you aren't going to be here anymore. All the memories...they're part of this place for me. Maybe it'll be easier knowing you aren't here anymore.
Tony: I know it'll be easier on me not to have to walk by the bar every day.
Annie: Oh god, the bar. And the window seat.
Tony: And the window seat.
Annie: I'm leaving now.
Tony: I know.
Annie: Remember- doors should be locked- even if you do have that stupid gun.
Tony: I was just going to threaten them with Keats.
Annie: Oh, well, I suppose that would work.An Ode to the Nightingale would probably make them reconsider their chosen profession.
Tony: Or put them to sleep.
Annie: I don't know- it seems pretty scintillating stuff- nightingales.I'll lock the door behind me.
Tony: Be careful driving home.
Annie: Yes mom.
Tony: Annie?
Annie: Yes?
Tony: I am sorry.
Annie: Me too. By the way, your towel is slipping.
Annie exits- a door shuts- and lights fade.
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